I’m pretty sure that Natalie is trying to kill me. Okay, now that may not be entirely true. I suspect that she has better things to think about than killing off at 35 year old fat girl with exercise. Things like taking care of her newborn, but this morning you would’ve been hard pressed to convince me of it.
*disclaimer: Teresa may have to correct my recollection of things as I was lacking oxygen when the following indecent occurred.
We started this morning, 5:30 a.m. to be exact, with our 2 laps and dynamic warm ups, activities that I expect. But then, Natalie decided to herd us all out to the treadmills, or as I now fondly refer to it “the killing zone”, for some cardio. We began at a 3 mph walk and then increased our incline to 3. Then came 6 mph for what felt like an eternity (2-3 minutes?). We then got to lower our speed to a brisk 4.5 mph but upped the incline to 5. Then back to 6 mph. I couldn’t do it. I surreptitiously lowered my speed and labored/panted/pleaded with the heavens for the next minutes to end. Are you getting that it was hard?
After leaving the killing zone we headed back into the gym to do a team ladder race thing involving arm curls at the first line, front lifts and side lifts at the second line and burpees at the final line, running back to the starting line before each new activity. All four team members had to run along while each person took their turn. I ended this feeling a little green.
We then did something else, I can’t remember. Lack of oxygen people! Before repeating the team race, trying for a better time. I opted to be the first one to run the lines and as I finished my term… it started. I grabbed the nearest towel and began to vomit. I vomited 6 or 7 times as I made my way to the dressing rooms. It was just water but still unpleasant. Natalie walked with me trying to help my calm down and breath because I’m pretty sure I was panicking at this point. As she left me in the dressing room, heading back to the team, she did tell me that while it was too bad I was sick it was awesome that I’d worked so hard. I think this is code for “Yeah! I’ve got some bragging rights with the other trainers!”.
Have I mentioned that I think Natalie is trying to kill me?
As I headed back to the gym, after splashing my face with cold water, I passed by Dan, the Sport’s Academy director, and he high fived me for being the first vomit of the competition. Is that a high five worthy event. If so… I totally rocked it!
P.S. I really do like Natalie.